


This Is Where We Say Goodbye (Karkat x Reader)

by DrownedTrying



Series: Homestuck Drabbles [1]
Category: Homestuck
Genre: F/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-08-26
Updated: 2017-08-26
Packaged: 2018-12-20 05:39:16
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,138
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11914344
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/DrownedTrying/pseuds/DrownedTrying
Summary: Just an idea I had for a drabble *le shrug*





	This Is Where We Say Goodbye (Karkat x Reader)

**Author's Note:**

> (Y/N) - Your Name  
> (BFF/N) - Best Friend's name  
> (N/N) - nick name

When you had first met Karkat Vantas, you were known as the (God Tier). He was an asshole, but when you had asked everyone else about him, they shared that it was to be expected. 

It wasn’t love at first sight. No, it was _far_ from it. You hated him. Not their weird black-rom hate, but hate, as in, ‘I’m going to slit your throat and feed your worthless body to the sharks,’ hate. It was clear he felt the same way, though he seemed to hate everyone else.

One evening, the two of you were battling some imps that had somehow made it onto the stupid meteor you were stuck on. With no other choice, you had to work in a team, though you wanted nothing more but to leave him to fend for himself. However, it was clear he needed help, and unfortunately, you were the only one around. Banters were exchanged, and you both found that, in the midst of the war, you both had so much in common, but so many differences.

After that, you two became close friends. There were movie nights, small ‘vacations,’ venting, the whole nine yards. You exchanged information of Earth, whereas he told you about Alternia. There were days (or nights. It depends on who you asked) where he’d come to your room, crying his eyes out about one thing or another. You always welcomed him in, calmed him down, and sat in your bedroom to watch romcoms. _Fifty First Dates_ was easily his favorite movie, but no matter how many times you two watched it, he always made sure to put in a movie you’d like afterwards. ‘Common courtesy,’ you told him. He never understood that saying.

Flash forward a few years. The game was beaten, and everyone who had died came back to life. Everyone decided to live on the planet you all created, deciding that it should be just for gods. Not that you minded, of course. Everyone built their houses, and robots that Dirk, Horuss, and Equius had built were put in charge of running businesses. Life was good, and your house was near Karkat’s. By hoverboard, it was roughly an hour’s ride. To anyone else, it was quite a distance, but seeing as everyone lived at least a few days away, Karkat’s hive was fairly close.

“(Y/N),” Karkat said one day. You both were walking through a forest, looking at the creations your teams had created.

“Yeah?” Your heart pounded, but you didn’t know why. Karkat looked up at the sky, the sun’s rays gently kissing his face. 

“One day, I want to try your human tradition,” he had said. You looked over at him, confusion written over your face. 

“Which one?” you asked. Karkat turned and gave you one of his small, genuine smiles.

“Marriage.” You felt the blood rushing to your face, and it was _that_ moment you realized you were oh-so red for this troll.

It wasn’t until around Christmas time that you heard that Karkat asked for Terezi’s hand in marriage. 

When you had gotten the news, you instantly fell to your knees and sobbed. Each day that you had talked to Karkat, you had fallen more and more in love with him. He was your best friend, and you had hoped that it would be like one of those stupid rom-coms he always watched.

It wasn’t the case.

At the wedding, you forced a smile as the music began playing, everyone in the church standing. Following suit, you tore your eyes off of Karkat, who was smiling widely and proudly, to turn to the bride. Terezi looked beautiful, the train of her white gown trailing after her. She smiled brightly in the direction of her husband-to-be, ignoring everyone in the room, especially you.

Why?

You were the one to catch her and Dave in bed together the night before.

Of course, you didn’t have the heart to tell your flush crush, and Terezi knew that. Instead, you were left to dwell on it all night, leaving you with _maybe_ an hour of sleep. You had gotten dressed reluctantly, only because Karkat wanted you there. He wanted everyone there. His team, John and his team, the dancestors, and Jane and her team, along with you and yours. 

You sat when everyone else did, Rose’s testimonies and their vows sounding like static as you watched the love of your life smile lovingly at the _one girl_ that didn’t deserve him. Just thinking that, you felt as if you didn’t deserve him, either. With tears in your eyes, you watched as Karkat and Terezi pulled each other into a passionate kiss.

You were the only one that didn’t go to the after party.

A sweep had gone by, and you were seeing Eridan Ampora. He had grown out of the genocide phase, and was quite a gentletroll when you spoke to him. 

Hand in hand, the two of you left the coffee shop. He had told a funny story from his childhood, which left you laughing so hard, you were doubled over, clutching your stomach, as you fought to breathe. 

Neither of you had seen Karkat watching you both from behind, a regretful look on his face.

Your wedding day.

You paced from behind the doors, nervousness overcoming you. Outside on the beach, all of your friends were seated, waiting to see you in your gown. Eridan would be waiting for you at the alter, smiling brightly and his eyes saying, ‘I human love you.’ 

You were _so_ ready for this, but why were you **scared?**

“(Y/N), it’s time to go,” (BFF/N) said, smiling softly at you. She was your maid of honor, and seeing as she was closest to you, she would be walking you down the aisle. You took a deep breath and nodded, smiling at her. The two of you made your way outside, just out of view of everyone else.

The music started playing, everyone stood, and you and (BFF/N) started your way down the aisle. The moment you saw Eridan, you forgot all of your worries, all of your insecurities, and every bit of regret you thought you had. He looked handsome in his tuxedo, a purple iris in his chest pocket. You couldn’t help but grin at him, causing him to grin. 

From the corner of your eye, you looked at all the guests that arrived. Dave was sitting by John, whom was holding Roxy’s hand. Kankri was your ‘preacher,’ which didn’t mind you, nor Eridan, one bit. Jade, Nepeta, and Kanaya were your bridesmaids, whereas Cronus, Dirk, and surprisingly, Sollux, were his groomsmen. His man of honor was Kurloz, which somewhat made sense. Princes needed to stay together.

“You look beautiful,” Eridan whispers as you reach him. You blush and take his hand, turning to face him. 

“We are gathered here today…” Kankri began. You couldn’t remember what else he said since you were too focused on Eridan. He was mouthing sweet nothings to you, to which you returned. Once the vows were exchanged, and a kiss was shared, you both turned to your friends, large grins on your faces.

Karkat wasn’t even there.

A year down the road, you were holding your head in your hands as you sobbed. The robot doctor had come back with the tests. If it were to hold any emotion, it would be sympathetic. Eridan had stormed out of the room once the doctor came in and shared the news, but now, you could hear him softly sobbing outside of the door.

“You’re unable to bear any children,” the doctor had said. “There’s something wrong with not only you, but with your husband. His sperm is infertile, and if you were to, by chance, conceive, both you and the child would die at birth.” The words hit you like a meteor hitting Earth, and it took a few moments for you to realize what it was saying.

_You’ll never be able to have kids. You’ll never be able to have a family._

Eridan soon led you out of the hospital, you feeling too numb to process anything. Robot nurses gave you sad looks as you passed. You didn’t want to see any of that. Eridan called everyone and told them the news, his voice breaking with his tears. The drive home to your house by the ocean was both too long and too short. Tears fell, but you couldn’t feel them. When Eridan helped you inside, you couldn’t do anything but stare at the floor. He ended up leaving for a drive to calm himself, which was a norm. You made your way to your room and picked up the phone. After the phone rang a few times, a voice finally picked up.

“(Y/N)?” Karkat. You needed Karkat.

“Something happened,” you whispered. “Something bad.”

“What?! What fucking happened?! Are you okay?!” Karkat sounded scared. Why is he so scared? You didn’t know why. You didn’t understand any emotion now. Everything just felt _empty._

“I just got back from the hospital.” Suddenly, years of not speaking didn’t matter. Years of seemingly avoiding each other didn’t exist.

“What?! Tell me what happened! **Fucking tell me!!** You know what? Fuck it. Are you at home? Of course you are. I’m coming over,” Karkat said, hanging up. You continued to hold the phone to your ear, not registering what he had said. When you noticed the silence, you put the phone down and sat on your shared bed, staring at the wall. After around ten minutes, you heard the front door slam open, footsteps running everywhere before the owner of the footsteps barged in your room. 

Karkat looked _scared._

“What happened?!” Ah, how you missed his loud voice. He looked older, but he looked nice. A gray hair here and there, the color of his blood filling the pigment of his eyes. He shook you again, repeating the question.

“Eridan’s unable to impregnate me, and even if he could, both the child and I would die,” you say numbly. Karkat reels back, his eyes wide and red tears filling his eyes. You turned your gaze to your lap, suddenly too tired to even look at Karkat. Why was he here anyways? He’s the one who stopped talking to you, so why would he care? You didn’t even expect him to pick up the phone. “Please leave,” you whisper.

“Wh-what?” Oh god, his voice sounds so broken.

“Please leave,” you repeat. “You didn’t want anything to do with me for years, so please don’t start now, and please leave.” Karkat tried reasoning with you, but all you did was turn over and try to sleep. It was a few minutes before the troll left.

It was a year later when Eridan came up to you with an idea. 

The pain on his face was unmistakable, but you could see his reasoning. He wanted a family. You did, too, but you thought those dreams were destroyed the day you found out you couldn’t have children.

“Kanaya discovered a dead Mother Grub out in space, and there was one egg remaining. I wanted to know if you’d like to adopt it with me,” Eridan had said, wrapping his large hands in your small ones. You stared at him before breaking down in tears. You never thought this day would come, especially since no one else, besides the teams, were on the planet. Nodding violently, you wrapped your arms around his neck.

The egg was a beautiful green. It was unclear on what the gender would be, especially this early, but the both of you were excited. You kept the egg warm, and Eridan took the night shifts to bring the egg into work with him so he could watch it. His robotic men took watch when he couldn’t, but neither of you minded. 

Your friends were all so excited, and when the day came for your new son or daughter to hatch, everyone, including Karkat and Terezi, watched excitedly. The grub slowly crawled out of the egg, blinking his bright green eyes at you and Eridan.

“Scree?” Everyone ‘aww’d.’ Both you and your husband went up to the small grub, smiles on your faces. 

“Hey there, little one,” Eridan whispered, gently picking up the grub. The grub stared at Eridan before grinning widely, exposing small, razor-sharp fangs. You both laughed, showering the grub with kisses and snuggles, unaware of Dave taking pictures of the scene. 

You both decided to name the grub Keefer.

You hated this day. You really did.

It’s been a month since Eridan was killed by Vriska’s robotic men, and today was Eridan’s funeral. You remember the day you had gotten the news, and even then, even now, it didn’t feel real. Even as all of your friends, clad in black clothing and tears of every shade falling, watched as you walked up to his casket in a knee-length black dress with a purple iris in your hair. Those were his favorites, and you couldn’t help but sob at the sight of wreath of purple irises placed lovingly next to Eridan’s military picture. You ignored those around you as you hugged his casket, violent sobs jerking your body around. 

He can’t be gone. He _can’t._

You don’t remember how long you stayed in that position, sobbing your heart out. Everyone had left one by one, unprepared for the burial the next day. Keefer was with (BFF/N), probably confused as to why you, his mother, was crying, and where Daddy was.

“(Y/N), it’s time to go,” (BFF/N) said, putting a hand on your shoulder. You shook your head. 

“I can’t just leave him,” you sobbed. “He hates being alone!”

“He’s gone, (N/N). I’m sorry, but he is. It’s time to go. Want me to stay the night with you?” You nodded, peeling yourself away from the casket. Keefer screed at you, blinking his eyes. 

You weren’t ready when they finally put Eridan in the ground.

Keefer grew up too fast for you. It was only yesterday that he was a mere grub, but now, he’s on his way to first grade. You smiled sadly and pulled your blanket around your shoulders, waving to your son as he steps onto the bus.

“Bye, Mom!” he cries out, a large grin on his face. From the distance, you could see him sitting by John and Roxy’s daughter, Casey. They were easily best friends.

Since Eridan had died five years ago, most of your friends decided to move closer to you in hope of cheering you up. It helped a little bit, but you still missed him everyday. You didn’t even sleep in that bedroom anymore in fear of ruining his scent. (BFF/N) became your next door neighbor, and often was over to help you around the house. You appreciated it.

“Morning,” Karkat says, climbing the stairs to your house. You nodded to him, watching as the bus disappears. After he found out about Terezi and Dave, Karkat quickly divorced her and moved closer to you and the others, refusing to answer to her calls, nor giving her his new address.

“They grow up fast, don’t they?” you asked, finally looking at the nubby-horned troll. He shrugs, smiling slightly.

“I guess so. Do you want to go grab coffee or something?” This was the norm. He or (BFF/N) would drag you out of the house until it was time for Keefer to come home from school.

“Even if I said no, you’d drag me there regardless,” you say with a smile, turning to go inside. Karkat follows you in, chuckling in agreement. You put the blanket away before grabbing your purse. Karkat waits patiently, keeping the door open for you so you both can leave.

“How are you holding up?” he asks, walking beside you to the coffee shop. You shrug, keeping your eyes in front of you. 

“I’m somewhat okay.” You pause. “I miss him.” Your friend sighs softly.

“I do, too. You two were good for each other.” You feel your throat close up, but you swallow hard to open it again.

“Thanks,” you choke out. Karkat nods, opening the door to the coffee shop. You walk inside and order your drink from the robotic barista. Karkat orders a coffee and gets a croissant, sitting across from you by a window. As you wait for your drinks, you both share small talk. It wasn’t long until you reached the subject of the blasted game. 

“Do you ever miss it?” Karkat asks. You crinkle your nose in disgust, leaning back.

“Fuck no. That game _destroyed_ everyone’s mentality. Why would I miss it?” Karkat frowns, but thanks the barista as your drinks arrive.

“I meant our friendship,” he says. You take a ip of your drink and wince. It’s too hot.

“Oh, yeah, I do. I miss how close we were,” you admit. Karkat nods and suddenly takes interest in his coffee, inspecting it closely. You wait a moment before trying your coffee again. It was still hot, but at least it wouldn’t hurt as you drink it. It was then you notice Karkat’s unusual silence. “What’s wrong?”

“Hm? Oh, nothing,” Karkat says, but you know he’s lying. You frown at him.

“Karkat,” you say warningly. He freezes and looks up at you before sighing, red dusting his cheeks.

“I’m just thinking of how close we used to be. Honestly, I thought you and I would end up together, but you liked Eridan so much…” his voice fades. You stare at him, shocked. “I guess if things were different, you and I would be married and would’ve adopted Keefer together, instead of you and Eridan. That makes me sound selfish, doesn’t it?” Karkat gives a humorless laugh. “Of course it does.”

“Wait, you liked me?” You found it hard to believe. Karkat nods, looking everywhere but at you.

“Yeah, which is stupid-”

“No it isn’t,” you cut him off, leaning forward. “I liked you back then, but when you started talking about Terezi and when you proposed to her, I just gave up. Eridan was the one who stayed by my side, so I guess I fell in love with him rather than with you. I still love him very much, and I miss him with every fiber of my being, but sometimes, I really do wonder if our futures could’ve been different if we talked about it.” Karkat smiled sadly at you as you rub the purple amethyst necklace Eridan had given you for your anniversary.

“Would you like to try it, when it’s not too late?” You return the small smile, giving the necklace a small kiss. Karkat looks hopeful, waiting for your answer. You open your mouth, and he smiles.

“I’d love to.”


End file.
